Sunday, July 24, 2011

Fear? Or fear not? Or both?

Today, I went to the St. Mary Magdalen Community anniversary mass and celebration. (More here about this church.)

The sermon was about ways that we need to transcend fear and how fear and love can't co-exist. Different examples of the way people had done this were cited, including the priests who spoke up in favor of Father Roy Bourgeois's stand in favor of women's ordination. Many great reflections. And I felt it was a good place for me to be today.

Yet something in me began asking questions.


Is fear necessarily always the enemy? I don't think we should base all our decisions on fear when there's so much of life to embrace and so much I know I've let pass by because of fear.

But if people had no fear, they'd jump out of buildings thinking that would be quicker than taking the elevator. Or put their hand in an open fire. If we didn't ever need to fear anything, would fear need to exist? But sometimes it protects us. Parents teach children not to play with electric outlets or put their hand on stoves. In my case, a hot radiator left a scar when I was a tot that I still have now--because I had no fear of touching that radiator.

So it's not so much that fear itself is a bad thing--any more than anger (at injustice, for instance). It's just like any feeling--useful in giving us cues about how to proceed or not proceed. Sometimes, yes, we can feel fear but move beyond it. But sometimes it can signal us that we need to back off or at least proceed carefully.

I wish it were not needed. And I wish people wouldn't exploit it.

I think of the man who shot at people in Norway. There was reason to be afraid. And he exploited people's fears--and trust. He pretended to be a cop, using people's ordinary trust in cops to lure people closer and then violated that trust by his horrible actions.

So very likely many will fear police officers, even though most are in fact conscientious and honest. This creation of fear when it didn't exist (or at least not to the same extent) is a secondary effect of his actions and possibly even further reaching than his shooting spree.

Really sad is that he not only posed as a cop but also claimed to be a Christian. If he were a Christian, he would not have acted as he did. But his actions will make people fear Christians and Christianity--as they often fear Muslims and Islam. "Christians are all right-wing fundies." "Muslims are terrorists." So people exploit fear, make it their tool. Very sad. And he's not alone, this shooter.

Childhood sex abusers use fear. Dictators do too. And so we come to distrust and fear all who represent any power or authority.

I'm not even sure where I'm going with this.

But maybe it's just that while we can't get rid of fear entirely--and it can sometimes be our ally--we just need to have the tools to respond to it.

Yes, it's normal to be afraid of fire. So we don't stop cooking, just use potholders when handling hot dishes and know how to put out kitchen fires.

Climbing a mountain is plenty scary. So it's wise to hold off climbing K-2 until you know how to climb smaller mountains. And some may never feel qualified to climb the 8000+ meter peaks in the Himalayas. But maybe they stretch their limits past their fears of climbing in the Catskills.

We each recognize with gratitude the fear we carry and that protects us--and then through love and wisdom know when to transcend that fear.

And through wisdom and love know when to fear a fake police officer or fake Christian--and discern when the police officer or Christian is genuine. This is hard--I'm not always sure I get it myself. Sometimes it's a matter of not jumping right in thinking to be brave (or in the case of the fake cop and other fake authorities) obedient--but heeding our intuitions, heeding that inner light whenever possible. Sometimes as we listen, we can move past the fear. Sometimes we need to walk more carefully or back off.

Just some Sunday thoughts.,..

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